In the fantasy recesses of my mind, the idea of video sexting always intrigued me. Having a glass of wine and chatting sexily as we watch each other become aroused… I like the idea. I was never under the illusions that it would be easy…. keeping a sexy banter and discussion that is stimulating for both… that’s not simple. So, I always thought it would be with someone I was already close with .. most likely my wife .. but at a minimum someone I had a sexy and very familiar relationship with.
So the title of this post – and the election mantra of Canada’s new (and excellent) Prime Minister – rings true. My read on video sex chatting, from my very limited experience with it, come down to those two elements Hope and Hard Work.
First the Hope – when you are home alone, either separated from your partner or not in a relationship, having really life sexual interaction with someone you either feel close to or find sexy… that’s pretty damned good. Its way better than porn (which can get pretty boring) for those of us who crave interaction. And its better than phone sex… adding the visual element which, for guys especially I believe, is really a plus. So.. it should be pretty awesome
The Hard Work. Two elements here:
(i) choose a ‘format’ – A wise friend said to be recently that to do a good video chat you need to first decide the ‘format’ you want it to take. It can either be (i) telling each other sexy stories and fantasies or (ii) directing the other person on what to do with their body and then describing how it feels as for you as they do those things. She felt – and she has more experience at this than me – that you need to choose between those two and you cannot do both at once. Good advice.
(ii) be prepared – Once you decide on the format, start to plan. If you are going to tell each other stories, make sure you have a few fantasies and stories ready. Or if you are going to direct him or her, think of a few scenarios you want to walk your partner through. In my – limited – experience with this it is more difficult having sexy discussion over video chat than in real life… and the awkward pauses feel longer. Some come prepared with some material so you can keep things flowing.
I’m thinking ahead to a world with ubiquitous VR .. video sex chatting may become as common place as meeting in a coffee shop for a date – so I better start getting good at it now.