A friend of mine may have a problem… or he may not.
He confided in me this week that he is an alcoholic. Yet he is an extremely high functioning, in control alcoholic.
Here is his situation. He has a very prestigious job and is very successful in his job. He is a good dad and a good husband. He is also, very likely, the most intelligent person I have ever met – not just really bright but scary 1 in a million uber-smart. One of the reasons for his successes, he believes, is that he senses and intuits things in ways that normal people don’t. He says he constantly feels hyper sensitive and hyper aware of how anther people are feeling and perceiving things. To the point that it often feels overwhelming.
So he drinks… to dull this overwhelming feeling. But he drinks in a very controlled way.
– 14 drinks per week maximum (and he measures it carefully and honestly)
– he will only drink 3 nights a week
– never at work unless it is one drink before a talk or something where he needs to calm himself down a bit
– I can attest that alcohol does not interfere with his work or family life
– Similarly, I can attest to the fact that alcohol has never, at any point in his history, played a more prominent or destructive role than it plays now.
Many people would drink this amount and in similar circumstances.
The difference.,, He is positive he is an alcoholic. He keeps it carefully and strictly in control, but he feels he ‘needs’ alcohol at the levels he allows himself to consume it.
So… thoughts. Is he an alcoholic? And whether he is or not, are there things he should change? He wanted my advice and I wasn’t sure what to say. I am not sure he has a problem… but I am also not sure he does not.