Do you like to be watched? Have you indulged?
A friend told me, the other night, that she had a secret fantasy about someone watching her have an orgasm. Not in a covert or sneaky way, but watching her and her husband have sex, and specifically watching her reach orgasm.
She raised it in the context of a discussion about ‘bucket list’. So, she has never done this in real life, but would like to. I asked her ‘why’ this particular fantasy. She was unsure and little inarticulate on it, but I think her reasons are twofold: (i) it is a fantasy she can indulge in with her husband and not feel threatened; and (ii) as a bit of an ‘attention whore’ she gets to be the complete centre of attention, especially at that point of orgasm – she was clear that her fantasy was to have someone watch her orgasm… they could watch the sex, but the turn on for her was being watched at the point of orgasm.
I have, of course, thought about the exhibitionist fantasy; my wife and I may even indulge in it occasionally. But this particular variation – focussing on the orgasm – was new to me and quite interesting. I think I get it – as we all know from watching amateur porn, sex is not always sexy to watch. So, having someone watch you have sex… maybe not. But the orgasm – that is where we are least inhibited and no matter how self conscious a person you are, at that moment, you feel and look great.
So… this particular variation of exhibitionism… does it do it for you?