Sex Ed is certainly a controversial topic, and finding balanced, non-values laden information is not easy. As parents of two pre-teen girls, my wife and I are trying to come to grips with the correct approach on taking to our kids about sex. While we consider ourselves very sexually liberated, we also admit that we are on the protective side of the parenting spectrum (not specifically regarding sex, but in general).
So, how to handle sex ed with our children? Firstly, and most obviously, we have tried to create a relationship with our kids where they are open to speaking with us about anything. I honestly think we have done a pretty good job at this, but I have to be objective and realize that when it comes to sex, our oldest daughter in particular just doesn’t want to talk about it; she thinks is yucky and too weird to talk about. On this issue, I am reminded of a line by Dan Savage (http://www.savagelovecast.com) where he says something to the effect of: you don’t talk to your kids about sex, because they don’t want to talk to you about it. You talk at them, and when you do so – be honest that you are going to tell them some stuff they need to know, that they don;t want to hear from you, but that you are going to tell them anyway. We plan to use this approach on our eldest – we will see how it works.
Secondly, what do you tell them? We have found a couple good sources we think we will reply on. The first is a resource (and book) by Planned Parenthood (http://www.plannedparenthood.org/parents/talking-kids-about-sex-sexuality-37962.htm) that seems to be very practical and of a neutral but informative tone. The second resource I came across and wanted to share is something called the media project (http://www.themediaproject.com/home.htm) which contains a wealth of facts and data on sexual health, issues and education, aimed at educating youth people.
This is a very new phase for us, so we will see how it goes, but it is good to see there are good resources out there.