I like sexy people and I would like more of them in my life. Wouldn’t we all… but what to do?
We get caught in the patterns of our day-to-day life, and the people we send time with are defined by convenience as a genuine affection for them (I think). So, my wife and I have been thinking about how to get more people into our daily lives that we really, really like.
We started by what we like in friends. For lack of a better word, we found that we liked sexy people. But not limited to sexy on the in the conventional sense.
When I think sexy, I think 5 things… and – spoiler alter – physical desirability isn’t there. Well, it is, but its last.
- A positive life outlook and a love of life. There is nothing sexier than someone who exudes positivity and embraces life in a positive way. And there’s nothing less sexy than a downer.
- A good story teller. I love people who have had lots of interesting experiences and tell them well
- A thirst for adventure. This is linked to #2. Sexy people like to walk through open doors, even when they’re not sure what’s on the other side. They are open to new travel, new hobbies, new conversations… they embarrass new and different things
- Interested in others. While all of the above are key to sexiness, those three characteristics – positive outlook, adventurer and story teller – can be the recipe for a great big bore if they only want to regale you with all the happenings of their great life. A sexy person is someone who, even with all they have to offer, is genuinely interested in others.
- Looks matter. I don’t believe that someone needs conventional beauty to be sexy. Sexy can come in many different looks and body shapes. But looks do matter. I think sexy people tend to take care of their appearance, stay in reasonably good physical health (but they can be on the heavy side). The best way I can characterize it is that sexy people have a certain glow, and that shone comes from a confidence and a deliberateness in their appearance. Its hard to describe, but you know it when you see it.
This is a pretty random list and obviously just my opinion. And I should have prefaced by saying that the trump card for sexy — the #1 determinant of sexiness — is, unquestionably, your own perception of your sexiness. If you think you’re sexy you probably are.
Sexy isn’t a be-all and end-all… but I would like a little more of it in my life