The Biggest Sex and Intimacy Killer: Anger


You might think that adultery or excessive drinking or maybe even traveling for work would be the biggest sex and intimacy killer in your relationship, but it’s not.

Well, yes those 3 things will kill intimacy (temporarily one hopes), the biggest erection and orgasm downer is anger.

If either you or your partner is angry enough to say, “I don’t want to deal with you right now,” it opens the floodgates to a world of no-intimacy, no sex, and no fun.

Here’s why and here’s how:

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1/3 of Moms Have “Gone Years” Without Sex

A new survey from Family Circle reports that 1/3 of  women surveyed have gone years without sex after having a baby. I was really curious about this result. After speaking with my wife about it, I guess I am not surprised by the result, but it still made me a little sad.  We were lucky.. … Continue reading 1/3 of Moms Have “Gone Years” Without Sex

Finding Common Ground: Healthcare

Watching the US healthcare debate, from Clinton to Bush to Obama makes me weep.  Second only to environment, in my opinion, health care has been a pawn in the right/left political debate, where both sides have allowed short term political positioning to trump advances on an issue critical to our lives.  And it is, literally, … Continue reading Finding Common Ground: Healthcare

Teaching Sex in a Healthy Way: How I Hope to Keep my Kids From Growing up Naked and Ashamed….

Very balanced

In her essay, Naked and Ashamed, Amanda Barbee critiques the way the Christian Church has dealt with the physical body and sexuality. Amanda discusses the ambiguity with which the Church has handled the human body in general, and then presses in to discuss the consistency with which women’s bodies have been maligned in Christian tradition. She lands more recently upon recent research that reveals  abstinence curricula like “True Love Waits,” increases shame responses for children/adolescents. This shame has been found to have similar effects on intimacy later in life to childhood sexual abuse.


Shame is a potent tool and one that has been used by parents, churches, and teachers–especially in the realm of sexual development/exploration–far too often. It worked, or at least appeared to on the front end. I’d like to believe that those pushing for abstinence only sexual education may not have known of the damaging effects…

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