As if a guy didn’t already face enough pressure to perform well between the sheets!
A successful kickstarter campaign has led to commercialization of the Lovley – essentially a Fit Bit for your cock. Think of a cock-ring that tracks the number of thrusts, speed of thrust and calories burned per sexual session and then sends all that data back to your smart phone. Oh, and it vibrates.
Fascinating I suppose… but really, why?
At one level, I think it would be kind of cool – as a novelty – to have this data… especially the number of thrusts and calories thing. I can see putting some effort into being more energetic (thus upping my calorie burn) and knowing how many thrusts I last (maybe trying to increase my longevity a bit??). At the very least, it could lead to some interesting discussions about your sexual style and approach — although I’m not sure these discussions really need to be supported by data. And there’s something to be said about losing yourself in sex and enjoying the moment, rather than trying to optimize the metrics … this definitely risks killing spontaneity.
But at another, much deeper level… WTF? Is this not the height of Western decadence? For years, I thought shoe umbrellas were the most ‘western elite’ invention I had ever heard of (see #3 on the attached list – it’s two mini umbrellas you place on your shoes to keep them dry if it rains). But the penis Fit Bit… isn’t it crap like this that led to the collapse of the Roman Empire? I’m as self indulgent as the next guy – maybe more – but if I have an extra $169 to spend (yes… 169 … brilliant price point for a sex toy) how could I look that poor street person in the eye knowing I put 169$ into measuring the speed of my cock thrusts instead of making a donation to the local soup kitchen.
So… to circle back… do I really need that much pressure in my life? I think I’m a pretty good lover… I’m not sure I want my iPhone telling me otherwise.